I finally caved in to my changing silhouette and bought some new clothing. My pants and button-up shirts have been steadily shifting to the “these will fit again in 6 months I hope” side of the closet. My work wardrobe in particular has been growing slimmer as I grow rounder.

This is going to be the winter of warm dresses and skirts, and I’m pretty stoked about it.  I’ve finally gone from vaguely pudgy to cute potbelly and I may as well take advantage of it.

TO GET TO A POINT. One of my dresses is TOTALLY a Slytherin dress in green, gray, and black stripes. And as my sister and I began to joke about pregnant teens at Hogwarts we wondered… which house would produce the most teen pregnancies? Slytherin are so ambitious, I can’t see the girls in particular willing to give up their life goals to risk dallying with the boys. Likewise, Ravenclaw are all overachievers on the college scholarship track. They are probably messing around like mad to relieve the studying stress, but they are being smart about it.

That leaves Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. Hufflepuff are hardworking, friendly, loyal, and honest.  Now, does that equal a bunch of romantics who don’t mind the notion of settling down into the lower or lower-middle class with their high school sweetheart and surprise baby? Maybe, maybe. Gryffindor, on the other hand, are full of daring, nerve, and chivalry. And as the books indicate, they can be bullheaded and maybe make dumb decisions out of confidence/idealism. Daring behavior plus rash decisions? And then sticking with those decisions due to a sense of chivalry?

Oh yeah, I’m definitely leaning toward Gryffindor here.  All them babies wearing red and gold. I can also see Hufflepuff girls being wooed by Gryffindor or Slytherin boys– the former would stick by her, the latter wiggle his way out of the mess, insisting he can’t possibly be the father and slamming her reputation around school.

And Professor McGonagall teaching sex ed, all dry wit and embarrassing the shit out of all the kids with her detailed descriptions of anatomy. Oh yeah, what the Harry Potter series really needed was sex ed class.