I fell off the face of the earth this year. My social media grew sporadic, my blog and newsletter were bare, my real-life relationships neglected. My older sister was dying, and I didn’t want to talk about it, but it was such a huge thing that not talking about it felt like a lie–an omission so glaring it couldn’t even be called an omission. Making jokes online or giving life updates without the largest thing happening in my life? A liar, a fake.
It was easier to just slink away and live that hospital visitation life in secret.
And now it’s done. Or, not really done, because the ripple effect is huge and my life is changing in some big ways, but they are the kind of ripples I will keep to myself, because privacy.
I will say: I had a dream the night before last. In the dream, we knocked a hole in our living room wall, and on the other side I discovered a ghost kitchen, where my sister was hanging out, baking ghost goodies. We built a little window to the other side, and brought her kids to visit–but it was only a window. No touches, no hugs. I woke up crying and wished, for once, that I didn’t have an active imagination.
Not exactly the cheerful kind of update I like for the blog.
So instead I present: OPERATION KEEP BUSY.
I’m feeling very motivated these days, in a “you could die any second so best embrace the To Do List while you can” manner. (Healthy!) To this end, I have spent the past couple of weeks on the following projects:
Holiday planning! Thanksgiving and Christmas are back, baby–albeit in a smaller, more cautious form. With kiddos getting vaccinated at long last, I am thrilled to be pulling out the board games and buffet platters once again. There will be sangria and fancy hats (and ok, probably tears).
Crochet Christmas! I cannot share more of these top secret plans until after the holidays, but rest assured: practically everyone is getting a crocheted present from me, because I have been obsessively crafting every night before bed in order to keep my hands busy and away from the doom scroll. (Again: healthy!)
Digitization Project X! This one isn’t top secret, I just wanted it to have a cool name. I’m digitizing our old family home movies from VHS tape, and boy howdy, there’s some great and there’s some cringe, and bits of both will definitely make the sizzle reel.
The Long-Awaited Garage Conversion! We began converting our garage into additional living space waaay back in spring of 2019. We managed to close up the walls and build some cabinets before our (lack of) budget and then pandemic intervened. After a very long hiatus, we are one carpet installation away from having a new room, woooooooo!
The 2022 CMMRVW Family Vacation! My siblings direly need a getaway after ::waves hands:: all this, so that is exactly what we are doing. The dates are picked, the place booked, the hideous group t-shirts commissioned: next spring, we are getting the hell away.
And, of course: OPERATION WRITE ALL THE THINGS! As you can tell from my writing page, this year wasn’t exactly my most productive. My brain malfunctioned under the stress and–oh well. But my brain is on the mend! I have nearly completed a new novel draft, soon to be sent to my agent! I have 50K worth of another book which I will complete next! I have a novella just awaiting a little more revision! And there are so, so many outlines brewing in my notes.
2021, you fucking sucked! I’m pulling the plug on this year early, and declaring us all now in Pre-2022. Let the Year of Keep Busy commence.
P.S. This helpy cat is HELPING:
Samantha Mills 