cat filler

I drafted a couple of blog posts and wasn’t satisfied. Mostly I am fatigued and weighted down by impending baby, so I’m going to go read a book instead of writing. Enjoy these kittygrams instead!

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Hades, mocking the way I sit down every day now

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And Stormy coordinating nicely with my body pillow

introducing stormy cat

And now, the other one.

Professor Stormfury (aka Stormy cat), nearly age 6, was named for the 1960s weather experiment, Project Stormfury. Go look it up, it’s amazing. And it was a name that has not gone to waste.

Shortly before getting married, Randy and I decided to get a second cat. We had toted Hades over to our condo, and Randy started hankering for a kitty of his own. By “decided to get a second cat” I really mean we decided to check out a fabulous Valentine’s Day sale at the local Humane Society ($14 for a cat including all shots, neuter, and fees!).

But you do not simply walk into the Humane Society and walk out empty-handed. I had my eye on this pair of exceedingly affectionate, exceedingly fat, exceedingly old black cats who had been spoiled rotten by the old woman who owned them before her death. But we weren’t prepared to take two more cats, and anyway it was Randy’s choice.

He fell in love with a massive gray tabby. By massive I don’t mean fat. This cat is LONG. Hades is a respectable 9 pounds, and this boy is 17. He was two years old at the time, a big goofy baby who did not realize how big he was and therefore frequently failed to stick his landings when he attempted to jump on or off various surfaces. Seriously he is the worst at being a cat, he just slides off the side of things.

The poor thing contracted a sinus infection at the shelter, so we had to quarantine him for weeks in our bathroom, force-feeding him medicine and water because he was too stressed/lacking-sense-of-smell to want to eat or drink. We thought he was going to hate us.

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Poor little nose!

But no, he has turned into the biggest, most lovable goofball of all. The folks at the shelter warned us he might be shy. HAH! Hades will grumble and hide when people he isn’t familiar with come to visit (literally he grumbles, I can hear him bitching when he walks away), but Stormy will run up to ANYONE for pets, and get himself so wound up he’ll pass out in the middle of the room trying to stay in the center of attention.

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Another deeply undignified cat

And if you don’t quite fathom how big he is, let me illustrate the difference between a 9 pound cat (considered on the “large cat” scale of cat measurement) and a 17 pound cat:

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I really am a cat and not some small breed of puppy

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So determined to fit in Hades’ cat house. Sooo unable to fit in Hades’ cat house.

Keep me away from the Humane Society or I will go home with all of them.

introducing hades

It’s time I formally introduce our boys. Our silly, silly boys. First up, Hades.

Hades (aka Bad Boy), ruler of the Underworld, is about 13 years old. When I was in high school my dad found a pair of kittens wandering on their own, could not find a mommy cat, and finally took them home. Hades and Athena:

How could you NOT pick up these fluffballs??

How could you NOT pick up these fluffballs??

This is how we acquired a lot of our cats. In this case, Hades and Athena were so teeny they still had to be fed via kitty bottle every couple of hours. The deal to keep them was: Mom would take care of them while we were in school, and the kids had to take care of them the rest of the time. The result: my brother and sister sleeping through every alarm, and me waking up every two or three hours to bottle feed crying kittens. -____- (Never forget!!)

Athena bonded with my older sister, but Hades is my boy. I left him home while I was away for college, and then he lived with my older sister for an additional year while I lived with an allergic boyfriend, but as soon as I was able to take him he was once again MINE. Following me around the apartment, sleeping with me, sitting on my lap at every opportunity. It was so nice to have a cat again!

He had been an indoor-outdoor cat for a few years, but his outdoor days ended around age nine when he got in a fight that scarred his eye and cut up his chest. Opossum perhaps? The evil red-eyed monsters had invaded our neighborhood at the time.

SIDE STORY: Haha that one winter we dug out our Christmas wreaths from the shed and discovered that a opossum had curled into one of them, died, and mummified. If I ever find that photo I will post it. With minimal context probably.

Anyway, Hades is now a pirate. It kind of fits the black cat aesthetic.

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Yargh coming for treats

He has taken to indoor life exceedingly well. Every year he is slightly tubbier, and slightly less dignified. He stands up for treats. He grooms my head when I’m trying to sleep. He has to have food in his bowl by 9 p.m. OR SO HELP ME HE WILL SHRED EVERY WALL IN THIS HOUSE. His days of hunting hummingbirds and bringing our neighbor’s baby bunny through the second story bedroom window are over, but retirement is nice.

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Ladies and gentlemen, the Ruler of the Underworld

I can’t imagine ever not having cats again. Next up I’ll introduce…. THE OTHER ONE.

I’m blorgering!

Obligatory opening post!  I’ll make it brief.

Last time I started a blog (aside from tumblering) it was the year of the tiger and I made lots of vague asskicking predictions. That blog lasted two years.  This time I’m starting in the year of the horse.  Now, I was born in a year of the ox.  According to some HuffPo Canada article I just read, oxes conflict with horses (for unstated reasons– workplace competition perhaps?).  The random guy summarizing the actual horoscope guy predicted that oxes will have arguments this year, but also work promotions, equitable police environments, and minimal romance.  This… is a mediocre prediction. Considering that I’m talking about predictions for 2014 in late March, I suppose I’m not off to a rip-roaring start, though.

Post number one and I’ve already completely lost my train of thought.

I scrolled through my old blog and there was some anecdotal gold in there.  Be prepared for some recycled material. I’m speaking in hypothetical second person here because only three or four people read my old blog. In any case, I promise I’ll leave off the endless progress reports and apologies for inconsistent blogging. I promise to try.

In life news I’ve been up since 4 a.m. on this fine Saturday, just planning my day.  We have three weeks to move and haven’t found a place yet. Two of of my jobs just gave me promotions and increased hours (year of the horse!!), causing me to put in notice at the third.  In my spare time I’m teaching my younger sister to drive, editing a book, and slightly failing my goal to read 100 books this year. I haven’t even starting making my Comic-Con costumes yet.

Clearly this is the perfect time to relaunch the old bloggaducci, but such are the decisions I make at 4 a.m.